Thursday, April 03, 2008

The Five Dollar Bookstore

First I would like you all to bear witness to the scene of the crime. This is the wall that I walked into. Ponder that for a while while thinking "what a clumsy bitch."



Now for the humor. Yesterday at lunch, I walked into Crown Books which is one of those bookstores who sell cheap books that no one wants to read. What a treasure trove of fun. Check out the following:



You know when I think authority on cocktails, my mind wanders to hemingway, my dad, and other raging alcholics, not Chrissy from Three's Company. Sure they loved the Regal Beagle, but does that necessarily make one an expert?



I never have to be alone? Really. Man God is awesome. I love me some God (who obviously is a rainbow lit dove). Speaking of which, no one is buying religious books, as evidenced by the following:





I don't know who this Zacchaeus is, but if Jesus is visiting him he must be important for a man in a tree. Wait a second, is Jesus like Firemen with a cat? The second one is something I think we all have thought at one point or another. I actually like the sequels, "Lord, please don't let this pregnancy test be positive" and "Lord, please don't let this be last call." Jesus Visits Zacchaeus is actually a children's book - nothing like corrupting minds when they are young! Here is another:



Obviously "Growing Up in Crawfish Country" is code for kneeling with your dog at a bog with a kerchief on your head. It truly is a hard knock life. And finally the piece de resistance:



I don't know what Ms. Millet was smoking, but I want some.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I hate when those cement walls jump out at you! I love hearing these stories because you know my middle name is "Grace" too.

Speaking of clumsy, Bill didn't see a culvert when we were out snowmobiling in Feb. and broke his back (T-12 fracture) and wrecked his sled. Now that is CLUMSY!

Keep an eye out for those walls!

If you ever find out what Ms. Millet was smokin' let me know so I can get some too. :)

Anonymous said...

Oh, and I thought for sure your comment on Chrissy's book would have something to do with the placement of the discount sticker because if it was slightly to the left it would have read "Summersize Cocks." Not sure if that would be a good thing or not - you know with shrinkage and all. HAHAHAHAHA!

Anonymous said...

I would like to say that I am sorry that you feel that books that tell children about Jesus are not what children need today. The story of Zacchaeus found in Luke 19: 1-10 is telling of a man who had wronged people and wanted to see and meet Jesus, to change his life. But, because of his height he had to climb in a tree to see over the other people. Jesus saw him and told him to come down because He was going to visit with him today. This parable is to show that Jesus accepted all people know matter who they are and we today should do the same. Children need hope and understanding and to learn what is right and what is wrong. What better why than learning of Jesus and His unconditional love for all of us. Please read John 3:16-17. May God bless you and your family.