1. Last week Owen was the unfortunate recipient of a stomach bug. This virus gave him, as my mom likes to say, “the shits.” There is nothing worst than the word diarrhea. I mean look at it. That being said, on Saturday after his three epic bathroom stints, I asked Owen how his stomach was feeling. To which he replied, “It is not absolutely great.” “Not absolutely great” instantly becoming my favorite saying of all time. Kids, you have to love them.
2. Tomorrow is The Kentucky Derby and there is a horse named Sabercat. First, what the hell is a Sabercat? This is what I think:
3. You don’t know what hell is until your husband gets an incline trainer treadmill. I am obsessed with incline treadmill training. And my “training” I mean holding on for dear life while cursing and huffing as if my lungs might just combust from overuse. It is awful, but awesome. I just said exercise was awesome. Who am I?
4. On my bike ride to work the other day (because I am a fucking hippie now), I saw this guy smoking while riding a bike. As in smoking a cigarette, while riding a bicycle. Because you know, smoking and biking are the new big thing. I am happy because I was able to pass him. Finally, someone.
Also, May the 4th be with you is stupid.
