A Lunch Time Visit to Safeway

Purchased:

Sara Lee Honey Turkey
Harvati Cheese
Tim’s Potato Chips (which promised to be super duper good)
Sandwich Rolls
Sour Jelly Belly Beans
Regular Jelly Belly Beans

I do not think anything screams pregnant than going to a grocery store to get turkey and cheese for a sandwich because you can’t stand another moment before that delectable concoction hits your taste buds. I had to get chips as well because well I love chips and sandwiches. Tim’s kettle-cooked promised “Many feel this is the best chip they ever had”. And thank you Tim, it is darn tasty. However the true pregnancy moment came when out of the corner of my eyes I spied the jelly beans. AND IN SOUR TOO!! I am now eating two sour lemons and two sour strawberrys for the recipe for a pink lemonade, and so good. Maggie is kicking up a storm. And I just had a sour watermelon. Orgasmic. I love cravings!

Hungry Like the Wolf

In no particular order, the following are a list of cravings that come into my head at the oddest times. I think about said food in a way that I can only equate with the word “graphic”:

1. Pears. I would like to eat 1,000 Barlett pears. They are so deliciously good, I take a bite and finish a pear and then am like - hello, MORE PEARS!! MORE PEARS!!

2. Truffles. Lemon Truffles, chocolate truffles, I don’t care. Just feed them to me non-stop. Let me be at the end of conveyor of truffles, and then let me die happy.

3. Potato Chips. Actually this can include anything crispy. I just want to eat them all - sour cream an onion, thai chili, salt and pepper, honey Dijon, new york cheddar. Just let them crisp in my mouth. Oh sweet heaven.

4. Grilled Chicken Sandwiches With Cheddar Cheese. No matter what I do, I can’t get these things out of my head, or out of mouth it seems. I don’t even want anything on them. Just the chicken, just the cheese, and just the bun.

5. French Fries. Specifically I want these fries I used to get in Beverly at the Goat Hill Grill. Steak fries. Big heaping fried pieces of potato dipped in catsup.

6. Sour Candy. I want to eat sour patch kids, sour patch watermelons, sour patch baby fingers. The funniest about this, is that I have not given into this temptation like the others. Mainly because I see them at See’s Candies, while in line for Truffles, but the price for a bag is $4.95, for Sour Patch Candies. It seems in the cheapness versus cravings war, cheapness wins, for now.

7. Oranges. Whether Orange Juice, or orange fruit, or orange tic tacs. I want them. And I want them bad.

8. Chocolate Milk. Bring it on. I will drink it until my blood is replaced by it. I would really like a fountain of it, so that I can swim in it with a extra long straw.

9. Pasta. Whether it be in pesto form, butter and cheese form, or baked ziti form, let me eat it, and let me shout from the rooftops - carbs, carbs, carbs, carbs.

10. Peanut Butter, Extra Chunky. On toast, on a spoon, in the jar where I gaze at it lovingly, Cassie and PBEC 4-eva.

By the way, after all is said and done after this pregnancy, I am sure that will be my new code name - extra chunky. But that is what Weight Watchers, running and breastfeeding are for.

Pregnancy Is A Funny Thing

There you are with an itty bitty person growing inside you. You are the vessel controlled by surging hormones and too tight pants. You are the victim of morning sickness and cravings. You are no longer are alone. Things about being pregnant that I have recognized this week:

What is it about meat? I have had two meatball sandwiches in the past three days, one from Toaster Oven and one from Gambinos New York Style Subs, because someone told me that they were much better. A normal person would say, I will get that meatball sandwich next time I crave it - say in 3 months. A pregnant person says. You don’t say, Gambino’s, eh? And then proceeds to think about said sandwich for the next 20 hours. How big are the balls? Is the sauce good? Is the cheese provolone or mozzarella? Is the bread super soft? Conclusion - I like the Toaster Oven better. I am unsure if this actual due to the meatballs or the fact that I in general hate anything associated with New York.

Someone in the office, who knows I am with beastie, said the following to me. “Cassie, have you lost weight? Your face is thinner.” Needless to say, after I dove upon this woman in flurry or kisses, hugs, and inappropriate office touching, I felt blissfully good. I do not think it is often the pregnant are given praise for their weight loss, but hallelujah I was. And do not think this is not going upon my gravestone:

Here Lies Cassandra Michelle Catherine McCall
Born October 30, 1973
Died TBD
Was once told during her second pregnancy, her face looked thinner. Also, loved the Pats. Considers the day Matt Cassel hoisted the MVP Superbowl trophy a day of pure awesomeness. Hopes she gets to haunt people.

I think I need to retire my button and zipper pants, because right now I am wearing a pair that castrating my mid-section. Is my face purple? Because I think it is. I must unleash the belly. I must!

Ham, A Love Story

Today is a great day. Not only has my seven month separation from my true love ended (hello NFL) but I have finally, after six weeks of obsessing, decided to make a baked ham. I desire ham crazily, pretty sure it has to do with this life growing in my belly. Please note that my last foray into haminess probably occurred circa 1998. It is in my thoughts at least three times a day. Dreamingly, I ponder the heavenly taste of it dipped into buttery mashed potatoes and then driven into my hungry wanting mouth, over and over again. I imagine there is no greater joy to me at this time than that of a freshly baked ham with cloves and pineapple. Saturday I have a date with destiny, until then I will drool and daydream. At the supermarket, after a careful and probably fraught filled selection process of the bone-in ham, I will pick up my love and dance a disco of delight. Shall I crochet a cozie for its journey home? Perhaps. Will it mind me peeping at it through the oven while it cooks in its juices and coca-cola (my mother swears by it)? Of course not. Will Owen or John get a single bite? I don’t know. Will I change my name to Hamzilla? It does have a ring to it. Will I eat it all in fit of ravenous desire? Most assuredly. Oh ham, I love you so. I can't wait until Saturday. Ham, sweet precious ham.