The Things You Hear . . .

This afternoon after lunch I journeyed to See’s Candies for a Dark Chocolate Chip Truffle, otherwise known as heavenly bliss. As I stood in line waiting for my chocolate, two ladies walked in chatting back and forth. It is then I heard the most frightening of words: “Oh, did you know I collect Barbies? I do. I love Barbies.” Immediately, I wanted to snap my head back with a look of horror at this person who well over the age of twelve collected Barbies, but I did not in fear of what my eyes would see. There I stood waiting in line listening to the Barbie Freak talk about how she has “Barbies from around the world. I have fifteen countries. They come in their country costumes, very ornate. But I don’t have room in my house to put them out.” (Thank God.) “I also have some Franklin Mint. Scarlett O’Hara, Princess Di.” (Are you single?) “I wanted the See’s Candies Barbie, but she got sold out.” (The shame!) I stood flabbergasted, behind me was a woman heartbroken over her lost chance of a See’s Candies Barbie doll. Me, I would be heartbroken if See’s Candies ran out of dark chocolate chip truffles, not Barbies, because you know why - I AM NOT TEN YEARS OLD. Her coworker, because I can only assume this woman has no friends, said “Barbies? Really.” Where Insano said “Oh, do you collect them?” As if. “No. But I had them when I was little”, hard not to suppress a chuckle there. Finally I get my chocolate and am able to look at Ms. Barbie, and unsurprisingly, she was middle-aged, a bit dour and kind of sad. I guess it is Barbies or cats. Maybe she is not entirely bad.

Father of the Year

This morning while walking up the stairs I heard the following conversation:

Guy: So Rebecca threw up last night.
Girl: Oh really? Is she okay?
Guy: Not sure, I think she is just vomits to get attention.
Guy: That or she really is sick.

Oh my god, father of the year anyone? Seriously, when you think your kid is vomiting to get attention before actually thinking that she is or may be sick, please just hang up your testicles and call an end to procreation. What an asshole.