Happy Anniversary

Today I celebrate five years of marriage with John McCall - five years, two kids and seemingly 13.5 hours of sleep. Last night, as we were going to bed, John said called me a doofus. You see, I am one of those people who only truly believe humorous acknowledgments of my being. I live for the joke, this is not to say that I am not serious, I am in ways. But I much prefer to laugh than lament. For example, the other night on the Bachelorette, one of the bachelors was having a serious conversation with his mom about his emotional development, his acceptance of himself and his new reality of wanting to be a person of substance. His mother listened intently, thanking him for an apology. All the while I am watching this, I am saying in my head - Do people really act like this? If I was to tell my mother any of that, she would have said “Oh my god, Cassie. What the fuck is wrong with you? Get a load of Cassie Mikey, Ms. la deee da. Emotional reality? Oh for Christ’s sake. Shut up and get over yourself.” So yeah, I don’t take things of a serious nature very seriously. But neither does John. After his doofus comment, I retorted with “Well, you are the one that proposed to me.” And he said, “Did I?” And I said, “Yeah, right?” To which he responded, “Ah, I don’t know.” And I guess I could have been “that” girl who can’t believe her husband forgets such important things, but seriously, I had no freaking clue either. The only reason I know today is my anniversary is because I have the wedding invitation on my refrigerator. So, yeah, Happy Anniversary John. You may or may not have proposed, but who cares really? I 50s styled trapped you by getting pregnant and now you are condemn to a life with a girl who doesn’t like birthday gifts, anniversary gifts, Christmas gifts but will instead play fantasy sports with you while drinking gimlets. Cheers to us. Also, we sorta kinda made these two nitwits.

Happy Anniversary

Today is my fourth anniversary with one Mr. John Preston McCall Jr. I would like to stress the junior part there, because I just kind of vomited in my mouth a little. No offense John’s Dad. Five years ago today we went to a Giants game (they won!), then to a bar (shocker!) and then we made out (whores!). Exactly one year later, we got married. Did I plan that? Oh hell no, total coincidence, what do I look like, an actual girl? But I did plan the pregnancy that forced him to marry me. Kidding - he got me drunk, bought an ovulation calculator and trapped me. Duh! But yeah, four years of babies and wine and laughter and beer and sports and vodka. And even though he once tried to steal Chris Carpenter from me in fantasy baseball (first official fight) and once watched Lost without me when I was a raging hormonal weaning mess (second official fight), I have forgiven him and love him very, very much. These past five years have been my absolute happiness (okay I am a girl, gosh darn it).

P.S. Still waiting on that third fight, but guessing it will probably involve not wanting to take Patrick Willis in the 5th round in our IDP League. (He is a total fourth rounder).

P.P.S. And we just happened to make these guys.